Battles of the Heart
by electricowl
Summary: Mai reflects on her struggling relationship with Zuko. Her worries are confirmed when she sees him sparring with a certain water bender. Most likely a one-shot.


Author note: This is my first try at writing a fanfic, so any comments and critiques are welcome!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything ATLA

* * *

"Mai?"

A familiar voice interrupted her thoughts, and she turned from her reclining state on the couch to give her intruder a bland stare.

Iroh grinned back at her. "Would you care to join be for a cup of ginseng tea, and perhaps a game of Pai Sho?"

Mai turned back to face the open window once more. "No."

Iroh let out a sigh and said, "Mai, we must discuss something."

* * *

A month earlier, Mai had sat complacently at the right hand of the Fire Lord's throne, hoping to be asked to dance. Zuko was throwing a ball to honor the summer solstice as well as the anniversary of the end of the Hundred Year War. She endured nearly four hours of torture being dolled up by half a dozen women who fussed over her hair, make up, and clothing. When it was finally over and they gently pushed her before a mirror, she gave herself a small smile. Her long black gown contrasted against her pale skin, and her hair was out of its usual style and was instead styled in an intricate up-do. She looked beautiful.

She sat at the center of the long banquet table, drumming her fingers impatiently. Zuko had sat down next to her only briefly before standing calling everyone's attention for a speech.

Her heart began to race. Could this be it? Could tonight finally be the night? They had been dating for years now and, as her father frequently said, it seemed time that he make an "honest woman" out of her.

The Fire Lord stood before the now quiet crowd and began to speak in a clear, distinct voice. "Tonight we have many causes for celebration. Tonight marks the beginning of the summer solstice, which our nation has celebrated for hundreds of years as a beginning to a season when we are at our strongest. This week also marks the five year anniversary of Fire Lord Ozai's fall and an end to the Hundred Year War." Zuko paused as the room began to ring with applause. After a few moments he raised his arms for silence and continued. "We are now in a new era where our nation, as well as the world, is beginning to flourish once more. With help from the avatar and his friends-" he raised his hand to gesture toward the left side of the banquet table, and there was more applause. "-we shall continue on this honorable path toward peace. Thank you all." The Fire Lord made his way toward the end of the table where his friends sat while the applause and cheering continued.

Mai sighed. Of course it couldn't be tonight. Zuko had made tonight about celebrating the Fire Nation, and of course the avatar and his little gang. Whenever they were around, they got all of his attention. But when she really thought about it, other things always got his attention before she did…political meetings, paperwork, training, lunches with his advisors…there was always something that came first. But it was never her.

She sat in her seat for the entire evening, watching as couples danced, leaders and politicians ate and socialized, and Zuko mingled with important people. She would let out an occasional sigh and would refuse the delicious food and drink that the waiters would offer her.

Toward the latter end of the evening, once a majority of the party guests had consumed more than a few drinks and the dance floor was becoming popular, Mai narrowed her eyes to glare at a couple dancing in the center of the room. The Fire Lord was dancing with a beautiful woman. If it had been any other noblewoman or guest, Mai would not have bat an eyelash. But it was her.

The water bending master, war hero, and now ambassador of the Southern Tribe, was a nuisance. Mai couldn't count the times that she had inquired a servant about Zuko's lunch or dinner plans, only to be told that he had a scheduled meeting with the water bender. Mai had even gone to his study and knocked on the door, only to have an irritated Zuko ask her what she needed so badly that she would interrupt a meeting with an ambassador. She knew who the ambassador was before she even glanced behind Zuko to confirm.

It didn't help that the water bender looked so beautiful tonight, either. Her long, flowing sapphire gown perfectly complimented Zuko's dark Fire Lord robes. Mai considered that maybe her elegant black dress wasn't the right choice tonight.

The orchestral band began a new song, and still the Fire Lord danced with the water bender. Mai began to grow irritated and she wished her gown had sleeves in which she could hide her knives. After two more songs, Mai began to grow sick with frustration. He had not even looked at her, he was spending the entire night with _her_!

Mai stood up and excused herself, although no one was paying attention. She decided to get some fresh air to calm down. She wasn't sure how long she stood out alone on the chilly terrace, watching the stars glimmer and the lights from the city's festivities glow, but she was interrupted by footsteps and giggling.

Zuko and Katara walked out to where Mai stood in solitude, their arms linked together, smiles on both of their flushed faces as they looked at each other. They didn't notice Mai until they were a few feet away from her.

Katara noticed her first and squeaked out, "oh!" before Zuko looked up.

"Mai!" he started, looking somewhat alarmed and unhooking his arm from the water bender's.

"You…you look nice tonight," he said quietly.

Mai walked away without saying a word.

* * *

"Mai…I understand that you and my nephew have been…having your share of differences of late," Iroh began over a steaming cup of tea.

Mai sat across from him at a small table. "I don't know what you're talking about," she lied.

Iroh let out a sigh, his breath causing the wisps of steam from his cup to bend forward and curl toward her. "It seems you do not wish to open up to me. That is just as well. Just remember, the caged eagle hawk, once released, will return to its master if it has been treated with love, loyalty, and respect. The master will know if its eagle hawk shall return once she has opened the door to its cage." With his ambiguous anecdote, he stood and bid her a good afternoon before departing.

* * *

Mai spent the rest of the afternoon wandering the palace, ignoring servants and staff who bid her a good day or inquired if she needed anything. She hoped that by moving she could escape the demanding thoughts buzzing around in her mind, and if she tired herself enough, she would be at peace.

She found herself at the training room, where Zuko would practice sparring and his fire bending forms twice a week. She smiled inwardly; having some practice with her weapons would calm her down and put her mind at ease. When she used her knives, she felt powerful. In battle, she would use her wits to defeat her enemies, concealing her weapons until the last moment to surprise her opponent. She was a little rusty, but knew that she was still deadly, always carrying a few dozen knives and stilettos under her robes. Ty Lee had suggested a spa day to relax, to which Mai rolled her eyes. She wasn't like most girls; practicing with her weapons was definitely what she needed.

A guard posted at the entrance nodded to her as she made her way to the door. As it opened for her, flashes of light caught her attention and she immediately snaked behind a column. She didn't want whoever was down there to know she was there, watching.

The situation became clear to Mai within a matter of seconds. She wanted to scream, she wanted to stamp her feet into the ground in frustration, she wanted to throw every weapon she had at them, to let them feel the pain they were causing her.

Zuko laughed playfully and yelled out, "You'll have to do better than that, water bender!" With a duck and roll, he avoided a spray of sharp icicles that had materialized and were raining down. "I think I've learned all your tricks!"

Katara smiled and retorted, "Time for a pop quiz, then!"

She pulled water from the gourds around the room, including one only a few feet away from Mai, and she moved quickly, using the massive amount of water she accumulated to give herself octopus arms. Large chunks of ice then began flying toward Zuko.

"Looks like you've learned something from Toph," Zuko said with a smile as he gracefully ducked an ice chunk and dropped down to deflect another with fire from his feet.

"She's not he only one I've been learning from," Katara yelled before dropping her octopus arms and surfing closer to Zuko on a small wave. She began making punching movements with her arms, and small, pointed arrows of water and ice shot out at Zuko.

Zuko gulped and began defending, thrusting out small juts of fire in an attempt to deflect the water and ice, but Katara was gaining on him; before he realized what had happened, he tripped and fell over a forgotten ice chunk from earlier.

Katara quickly stepped over to him, all her water hovering above her and Zuko while he looked at her with wide eyes.

"You need to be more aware of your surroundings, Fire Lord," she said with a smirk before dropping all the water onto him in a wave, pushing him against the wall of the training room.

Zuko groaned as the water flowed away from him, leaving him completely soaked, his hair hanging down in his face. He looked like a wet dog. Katara started laughing, and it appeared she couldn't stop if she wanted to. She clutched her stomach and continued laughing as Zuko shook his head, spraying little flecks of water at her.

Mai wanted to go down there and slap Katara for humiliating him, but before she could even think about it, Zuko stood up and starting striding towards her. He towered over her, still dripping wet, as Katara bent over double from laughing at his misfortune.

"I'm…I'm sorry," she managed to gasp out. "But that was too good."

Mai thought that Zuko would hit her himself, or burn her for her disrespect, but he surprised her by cracking a grin.

"You win this round."

* * *

She snuck out of the training room and made her way back to her chambers, Katara's laughter still ringing in her ears. Now she was _definitely_ not feeling calm. She kept her composure while walking through the halls, again coldly ignoring anyone who crossed her path. She made it to her room, closed the door, then fell back against it and sank to the floor.

Mai hadn't been certain that she was losing Zuko, hope had remained that he was just truly a busy leader who could not find much free time to spend with her. She was sure his mind was always busy with thoughts on meetings and other political issues when he would quietly sit with her, not focusing on her. She still held onto the fact that he loved her, and that he intended to marry her and make her his Fire Lady.

After watching them spar, Mai knew. She finally had confirmed for a fact that Zuko not only did not love her anymore, but he had fallen for her. The water bender.

"Gah!" she cried out, throwing five knives into the wall across from her.

They moved so well with each other, and she could tell they knew each other's techniques very well by now. They were comfortable together; watching the way they fought against each other just showed that. She could only imagine them fighting together instead of against each other. They would be an amazing team, a pair that would easily anticipate the other's move before making their own. She thought of the laughter, the closeness they shared at the ball, their arms intertwined like two lovers, all the times he had his meetings with her.

What broke her heart the most wasn't that she now knew she would never be Fire Lady, or that Katara would have Zuko in ways that she never did, or even that Zuko would be happier with someone else. What broke her heart was that she had never made him smile the way Katara had in that training room; she never made him blush the way he did on that terrace. She truly did love Zuko, but that was not enough. She was not his partner, he didn't tell her about his meetings and his struggles as Fire Lord. They had never sparred together, and the last time they had danced had been ages ago, at his coronation. There was no fire in his eyes when he looked at her.

She laughed mirthlessly when she thought about it. The Fire Lord, in love with a water bender. How silly.

She wasn't sure how long she sat there on the floor, but eventually she stood up, straightened her robes, and wiped under her eyes before glancing in a mirror to make sure she looked presentable. She didn't bother removing the knives from her wall as she strode out of her room with purpose.

It was time to let this eagle hawk go.


End file.
